"I feel better" - A lesson from my 2 year-old daughter
That’s what my 2-year-old would say when she’s about to recover from a meltdown or crying episode.
She would still be sobbing a little bit, with some teardrops in her eye and look at me saying “ I feel better”. This melts my heart every single time.
Every time I hear her say that, I feel so grateful - for my little daughter knows how to articulate how she feels, but more importantly, because she appreciates her progress and reminds me to do the same.
In my coaching experience, I have seen clients who come to a coaching session expecting transformational results. They would be disappointed if they feel that’s not the case. What does “transformational result” mean? One should cry? jump ecstatically? Found their life’s purpose? Whatever that means for you, transformational results don’t just come if you don’t appreciate the little progress you have made towards a transformation.
I was one of those transformation-seeking-clients. I was so critical of the coaching session, not knowing it was actually me criticizing myself. I gained insights, I felt good, but I disregarded all of these and jumped to a conclusion “I didn’t get much out of it. I didn’t feel a big shift. I didn’t change.”
Now that I know a little better, I realize how painful it could have been for that part of me who managed to shift a little bit, yet got crushed once again with my critical self, hindering the next step towards the “transformational result” I was looking for.
The truth is if you can’t walk, it’s difficult to run, or jump.
So the next time you do something, acknowledge your little progress - to make yourself ready for more.
The next time you try to recover from a failure, a heartbreak, be your own best friend and acknowledge when you know “I feel better”.
If you keep rejecting your little progress, one day, the Universe will stop sending you those.